Hopeful Skepticism in the Classroom: Rebuilding Trust and Connection

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “These kids just don’t care anymore” or “Why bother, nothing ever changes”?

That creeping feeling of cynicism is common in education. It’s a natural response to stress, setbacks, and the emotional toll of teaching. But recently, I listened to an episode of the Evolving with Gratitude podcast titled “Jamil Zaki on Hope for Cynics,” and it reframed how I think about cynicism—not just as a mindset, but as a barrier to connection and growth.

Jamil Zaki, a Stanford psychology professor and author, challenges the common belief that cynicism equals wisdom. In fact, he reveals how cynicism undermines trust, harms health, and erodes community. Here are some of takeaways from the episode and how they might support educators both inside and outside the classroom.

1. Cynicism Is a Theory, Not Just a Mood

Zaki defines cynicism as a belief system: the idea that people are inherently selfish, greedy, and dishonest. It’s not just about feeling negative; it’s about assuming the worst in others.

Why this matters for teachers: When we adopt a cynical outlook, we may misinterpret student behavior, erode our sense of agency, and reinforce negative expectations. Instead, viewing behavior with curiosity rather than judgment can open the door to understanding and empathy.

2. Hopeful Skepticism as a Healthy Middle Ground

Zaki introduces “hopeful skepticism”—the idea that we can remain open and understanding without falling into negativity. It acknowledges our bias toward negativity but encourages us to test our assumptions.

Classroom application:

• Fact-check your feelings. Ask yourself, “Do I have evidence this student is being disrespectful, or am I interpreting their behavior through a stressed-out lens?”
• Send small trust probes. Try small gestures of trust or connection and observe the response. Often, students rise to the occasion when given a chance.

3. Practice Positive Gossip

Zaki recommends sharing at least one story of human kindness each day. This simple habit can shift what we notice and value in our daily lives. The good stuff is easier to find when you are actively looking for it.

How teachers can use this:

• Share positive stories in staff meetings or class circles.
• Start or end the day with a “kindness spotlight.”
• Catch students doing the right thing and talk about it.

These practices help create a classroom climate that values and expects goodness, not just compliance.

4. Embrace Tragic Optimism

Inspired by Viktor Frankl, Zaki talks about embracing pain and hope simultaneously. Tragic optimism means acknowledging suffering while still believing in the potential for good.

This can be foundational in terms of teachers mental wellbeing and career longevity. Tragic optimism allows us to acknowledge pain without becoming paralyzed by it. It fuels resilience and reinforces our belief in human dignity and possibility.

5. How Hopeful Skepticism Strengthens Student Relationships

When teachers practice hopeful skepticism, they’re more likely to engage with students from a place of trust rather than defensiveness. This shift changes the tone of interactions and encourages students to open up.

Ways it helps:

• De-escalation and patience: A hopeful mindset helps teachers pause before reacting. Instead of taking behavior personally, they can respond with curiosity.
• Modeling resilience: When teachers openly acknowledge challenges while showing hope, students learn how to do the same. This can be especially powerful during difficult moments.
• Making connections: Students sense when teachers genuinely believe in their ability to grow. Hopeful skepticism communicates that belief—even when students stumble.

In the long run, this mindset helps build a culture where students feel seen, respected, and empowered to improve.

Reframe to Reconnect

Cynicism might feel like protection, but it often isolates us. Hopeful skepticism invites us to stay connected—to ourselves, to our students, and to what’s possible.

Where in your teaching life have you let cynicism creep in? What might change if you approached that area with hopeful skepticism instead?

This podcast reminded me that trust isn’t foolish—it’s essential. And sometimes, the first step toward rebuilding it is simply choosing to believe that people (including students) are better than we think.